Glimpsed Rewind

Laney comes back from tour in ten days. Count them with me. 1...2...3... Its going to be ten excruciating days.

I think the last I wrote, I was going to surprise her at a few of her shows. The first one I showed up at was in Athens, Georgia. Some dive that I can't remember the name of. I stood in the corner and watched my girl do her thing. God, how I love to watch her. She looked as beautiful as ever up there beating the shit out of those drums. Except, one thing was missing. Her sexy ass smile.

When her set ended, they all made their way backstage. I snuck past the militant psycho guard guy and waited in the shadows. I nearly jumped out of my skin when my cell rang. It was her. She sounded so sad, my heart was breaking with every word.

Laney: Hey baby. I miss you.
Me: (I was staring right at her, she was sitting against the back wall smoking a cigarette) I miss you too. How was the show?
Laney: I think we did okay. (She closed her eyes and rubbed her forehead.) I really have no idea how we did. It was like I was going through the motions but I really wasn't here.
Me: Well, where were you, baby?
Laney: (A smile consumed her face as she held her eyes closed tight.) I was with you. On the beach behind Starr's house. And you were telling me that you love me.

As she kept her eyes closed, I moved through the crowd and knelt down beside her. I closed my phone and whispered, "I love you," in her ear.

She knocked me to the floor with her hug and kiss and I knew I made the right decision.

I stayed with her until the end of last month. And this has been the longest month of my life. Starr, Speed...I'm thinking of asking her to move in with me. What do you two think?

Recap

Dawn patrol was a blast. Thanks, ladies, for a hysterically fun and funny time. Bruiser, I will never forget the look on that guys face when you told him to suck your dick. It was priceless. And Walker...you made out with his girl! Score: 1 for the lesbians.

Kay went with us. Its actually the first time she has ever hung out with the CLC crew. She is as sweet as Peace and a sick surfer. They have waves in New York? Hah! I think anywhere has bigger waves than the ripples we've got today.

We joked with her all day but she knew we were joking. She has the perfect sense of humor to hang with our group. I think she's actually a bigger smart ass than Walker.
Peace...it is unanimous! We love her!

I just finished an article for a paper that shall remain nameless. Its a little controversial and the editor loved it. I think he might be just as crazy as me. I might just have to do a hate mail tally on this one. I'm sure its going to piss people off.

But....that's what I love about writing!

Oh. and surfxracer...plans for a road trip are in the works sister!

Peaceful

I really can't believe its been so long since I lasted posted. I think we all got caught up in our lives and it seemed so much easier to just call Starr, our Guru of sorts, when things got crazy. And things did get crazy.

Dimes surprised us all. And Candy is so squeaky clean. And Walker didn't walk. And Bruiser stood her ground. And Starr, well, she held us all together through everything. And now...Speed is back, at least online and the only one missing is Jinx. And of course, J, Speeds girl. Now that we have Speed, aka surfxracer, writing her own blog, I'm sure we will all start writing in here again. It helps us feel connected.

I think I left off with the first night that me and Kay slept together after finding each other again. I remember I was uncomfortable and just couldn't relax. It was kind of weird after that. Though I talked with Kay on the phone a lot, I didn't see her again until about two weeks later. I needed to think so I spent a ton of time at the ocean. The best place to think.

I had this internal struggle going on...half of me wanted to be with her and the other half was scared to death. And the scared part was telling me to run as fast as I could. I was torn, so torn.

But then, it hit me like a shovel in the cartoons and this huge knot formed on top of my head that ended up being the best logic I had come up with through it all. We never really had our chance. It was ripped away from us right in the middle of its blossoming beauty. There was no way to get around it...I loved her. And when I saw her again, I realized that I was still in love with her.

As much as the pain and confusion of the past clouded me, she went through it too. She felt it all too. If I didn't let us have this chance to finally see what we could have become, I would have cheated her too.

We talked about it all. We cried and shared the pain of that night together for the first time. And pain it was. Even talking about made my face sting like her mom had hit me again. But that was nothing compared to what both her parents did to her.

Now, we are together and honestly, I have never been so happy in all my life. And things, things that we shared before, they all came back. We've dealt with the bad and revived the good.

I always knew she was the love of my life.